Finding It.

It's not how you begin, it's how you finish.
  
I didn't really want to ride, but I did want to ride. If that makes any sense. I didn't want to fight the wind on the same stretch of road I've been riding the last month, but I did want to get out and fall into the familiar rhythm, stretching my legs and forgetting about all of the dissonance in the world, if only for a little while.
  
I rode into a stiff headwind, but the skies were blue. I pedaled at reasonably decent wattage and could have been discouraged by the speed I was traveling, but I wasn't. I let my mind wander, not noticing the now-familiar yard debris that have become my waypoints along the road. Thoughts came and went, and thousand blog ideas that drifted away with the wind. It didn't matter. Only the rhythm mattered.
  
When I turned around, I settled in again. Quite a bit faster with the wind at my back. I didn't cruise or push, holding onto my little piece of stability. 
   
For the first time in a long time I felt normal, and it was everything I hoped for.
  
I won't say I finished strong, but I will say I finished happy.

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