Gotta Admit, It Seems To Be Working.

After my abortive attempt to get on the bike a month after I plowed into the pavement, I wasn't so sure getting back on the bike was such a good idea. A lot of that was mental, but I have to pay at least a little attention to my self-preservation instincts. That first attempt probably knocked my physical recovery back a couple weeks and did even more damage to my mental recovery. I was just getting to the point where I could fake a passable "normal" walk for a good portion of the day. I developed this talent so people wouldn't stop me in the hall and ask when my surgery date was or just wince when they caught sight of my shambling gait.
  
Even after I got back on the bike, my brain kept telling me it was too early. I ignored it, because my brain was also telling my mouth to spout off at inappropriate times and dwelling over negative thoughts for far too long. I realized that brains are stupid. I needed my outlet back, so I kept pressing on through the negativity until it shut the fuck up.
  
It took a while, but the huge knot in my hip started to reabsorb into the surrounding tissue, returning to it's normal state as lumpy, fatty deposits. Range of motion started to improve. My grunts when getting out of the car or up from my desk chair didn't resound quite as loudly. When I pushed down on the pedals, I didn't have to throw as much of my weight behind that one side for the cranks to come around. I don't have to present the illusion of a normal walk most of the time.
 
Progress.
 
I'm glad I got this going before the snow fell. I'm glad that I pushed through all of the excuses and aches to get here. Even if I still have times where the hip locks up and I shuffle off to bed early from fatigue and aches, I'm improving. My mood is more positive.
  
As I said, brains are stupid.

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