Climb Every Mountain.

When I hit that nice, round Chronic Training Load (CTL) number on Training Peaks, I thought it was a nice place to stop. I set up my workouts to start easing off a bit, to prevent burnout. For a few days I actually stuck with the plan, and then the numbers started climbing again. Maybe it was a sprint-friendly course or a group on Zwift that drove me to push the boundaries a bit. At any rate, a new, beautiful, round number was staring me in the face and I couldn't resist.

The last week of the trip I pushed it a bit harder, and I passed the number on Friday. Then I kept going, fearing it would drop below the magic number on my next rest day (which is kinda the point of not riding). I added a little padding on Saturday and Sunday, and was rewarded with the kind of fatigue that comes extended, pointless flogging of oneself. I've never been a huge fan of stairs, but when you need a nap, 5 Hour Energy, and a pep talk to make it up a single flight of stairs, you know you've overdone it.

I'm properly cooked, and I don't think a couple of days of soft-pedaling is going to cut it this time.

Thing is, even though my body screams profanities at me every waking hour, my head is still ready to go. I take that as a good sign. 

Considering where I was fitness-wise three months ago, I'm pretty happy with how things are now. When I got back on the trainer, doing five hours a week was an onerous task. Now I double that regularly, and I've managed some decent intensity in there. Nothing compared to what I was once capable of, but certainly several pedal turns in the right direction.

I don't know what I'm going to do with this fitness. I'm hoping to back off, recover, and then start building on the foundation I have. That's the plan, but I could just as easily fizzle out somewhere in March. It doesn't take much. A mentally-draining hitch at a site, a schedule change, family commitments...

I'm not planning on racing next year simply because I don't think the vaccine is going to be widely distributed by then and socially distanced racing does not interest me. It's going to be a long, hard winter by the looks of it, and come spring I expect another surge as people tire of being cooped up. COVID scares the hell out of me, as the damage to lungs and other body parts used for riding is something I don't want to risk for an office park crit. I really haven't raced in a few years, so what's another one going to hurt?

So what is the fitness for? What is the goal? It's not as concrete as a race or event. It's just the feeling I get when I'm on some sort of form. I deal with stress better when I have an outlet to throw my frustrations at. And there's always that day in the future when we can return to some sort of "normal" and pin on numbers for real.

That's the real mountain I'm climbing. CTL is just a placeholder for now.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sad

Recently a judge accepted a plea deal. A drunk and stoned young woman backed over a local cyclist, then drove away while he died without rendering aid in any way. This is not in dispute by anyone, on any side of the courtroom. She received 1 year and 10 days in jail.   I've tried to wrap my head around this from any number of directions, and it just makes me sad. Not for her. As far as I'm concerned, she has no place in society anymore. This is not her tragedy, as much as the defense tried to paint it that way while deflecting blame to the victim. I've harbored evil fantasies of vengeance that I'm not at all ashamed of. So much ink has been thrown out there about this that I'll just include a couple links to provide a more complete picture for those of you who haven't followed the story: http://www.adn.com/article/20150812/prosecutor-teen-used-drugs-alcohol-hit-and-run-collision-killed-cyclist http://www.adn.com/article/20150819/anchorage-teen-receives-1-y...
Read more

Perhaps Where I need to Be.

  The last time I was in Biloxi was in November of 2016. I was recovering from a broken collar bone, but otherwise was relatively fit, lean, and getting fitter and leaner. Because I had nothing else to do and energy to burn, I rode a lot. It was wasted effort that translated into burnout during the trainer season, but I really didn't care. I hadn't been riding at all. A handful of road rides before the season ended. A couple fat bike rides when the trails near my house were packed well. Mostly I've hiked, cross-country skied, and sat on my fat ass. Primarily the latter. I knew I was going to be spending the month of February in Biloxi. I swore I was going to get back on the trainer in preparation, but I never did. I came in cold. I packed all sorts of warmers and raingear and stuff that I have yet to use.I forgot all sorts of tools. My tires were excessively worn and my tubes weren't in great shape either. I ended up buying new ones after a horrible first ride led to 4 ...
Read more

No FOMO.

Ever since I fell down, something interesting happened.    I don't frequent Facebook as much anymore. I don't spend time scrolling through other people's posts, scared that I might miss something important. Facebook isn't important.    I don't visit cycling websites obsessively, mainly because it reminds me I can't ride myself at the moment.   If I do get on the interweb, it's to look up parts for the RV or look for how-to articles/videos. Nothing about the bike.   I've even stopped listening to NPR as I drive to work, but that has more to do with the constant stream of negativity that characterizes the world at the moment. Without my daily dose of endorphins to blunt the onslaught and put it into perspective, I find I just can't deal with it at the moment.   I have no fear of missing out, because I've opted to ignore the world for the moment and concentrate all of my energies into a smaller space where I ha...
Read more