Catching Up With Modern Society II.

After upgrading and simplifying my internet service (and saving a ton of money in the process), I looked for other ways to improve stuff (and save a ton of money).
  
My wife had always paid the cell phone bill, so I never paid attention to it. I never wanted a cell phone in the first place, because I don't like being interrupted when I'm riding. If you want to convey something, leave a message or send me an email and I'll get back to you. Few things justify your need for instant gratification and require my immediate attention (on the other hand, my needs...). However, you can't find pay phones anymore, and sometimes things go sideways on a ride. Eventually I caved in and got a burner phone. Then the wife forced me to get added to the family plan (to save money, she said). I eventually inherited her old smart phone, replacing the battery because I'd rather fix things than dispose of them needlessly while they still have utility. Life cruised on this way for a while.
  
Last summer the wife quit her job and went back to school. She didn't have the income to pay the bill anymore, so it became my obligation. I was shocked how much we were paying for a service I really didn't like but modern society has made almost mandatory. I started looking for other options. Since we no longer had a home phone, a really long coiled phone cord (my first thought) wasn't a viable solution.
 
The provider she was using has a long history of creating awesome packages and then not telling existing customers about them, thus squeezing every dime they can out of the contracts. She never asked and they never told her. Since I was on the hook now, I decided to ask. Yep, they had many plans that had more data, were cheaper, and came with free doughnuts on Wednesdays. OK, maybe not that last part, but the other two got me thinking.  
  Since I'm lazy and I want to limit the number of bills I have to pay in addition to the total amount of money I have flowing out of my accounts on non-bike-related expenses, we stopped by my internet provider and asked about what they had going. To start, the basic plan they offered us had twice the data. We'd all get new, upgraded phones at no charge. The coverage within the state would be more comprehensive. Oh, and the price when all things were said and done would be a third of what we were previously paying.
 
Sign me up.
 
Granted, I didn't want the upgraded phone because it had a larger footprint than my antiquated but still very serviceable phone. Bigger is not always better, and riding around with a tablet in my rear pocket isn't my idea of sleek or aero. However, this new phone had plenty of memory for apps I won't download and pictures I'll never take, so there's that. If I'm lucky, Apple will force a U2 album I don't want down my throat. There's plenty of space for it.
  
So, the budgetary streamlining continues. Every dollar I save is a dollar I can steal from my children's college funds to put towards bike crap. I call that sound financial planning. I won't repeat what my wife calls it, because I know you guys are dainty little flowers and sensitive to profanity.
 
Now I need to see what I can get for the old phones...